The sound that my brain is making as I make it through the last 2 finals of 16 credits of summer classes that I took. Why would I take a summer so full of classes? Because I want to graduate by MAY! That thought may be the only thing keeping me going right now, because if there was a definition for someone with senior-itis (that is the scientific name), that would be me right now. Now I realize some of you know the situation for why at 26 years old I am still hammering away at a degree and it is completely my fault but it does not make my burned out feelings any easier right now. 3 majors and 6 years of school later (I took some time off), I am finally seeing a light at the end of the tunnel. *Insert Hallelujah chorus here*
All I want is to be done. Is that sad that the quest for knowledge has led me to feel exhausted and bitter? Maybe but I realize now that college is more of just an avenue to get through before they will pay you any kind of real money for a job. That is not to say I am in a degree that will get a lot of money (just the opposite), but that I realize what it takes to get through school. I am just stating that I have learned to be a professional BSer and procrastinator, without actually learning that much (OK I have learned a lot but I forgotten a lot as well). I was never the best student. Yes, I will admit I love the last minute pressure to study, it is the only way I learn. P-A-T-H-E-T-I-C.
At least Calvin gets my drift. It doesn't help that I do enjoy a lot of extracurricular activities and that a lot of my week now is spent training, but those moments in training allow me to spend those needed moments in front of my books and computer...who wouldn't want to go for a 7 mi run after spending hours staring at words, graphs, and pictures. I am just a girl who wants to enjoy my life. I do not want to regret missing things because I had to work my arse off. I much rather lose out for a job then actually compromise on the things that make me REALLY HAPPY. So maybe that is wrong for some people but in my belief we only have one life, live it.
If I just make it for this next 3 days....study, study, run, bike, swim, climb, study....